and there's more..

coach (to player texting): you don't have time to text your girlfriend, we need to get ready
player: it's not my girlfriend!
coach: sure it isn't, we can see through that one.
player: no really, it's my parents.
player: actually, you should give me props, i did get a 20 year old girl's phone number once.
coach: sure you did
player: no i did, because i gave her a klondike bar, she gave me her number.
player: you know what they say coach, (*singing*):what would you do for a klondike bar?!

-----

c team player(to coach during the 1st quarter): hey coach, do they have halftime at basketball games?

-----

coach(jokingly): hey, we're getting complaints from the other team's cheerleaders that you won't leave them alone
player: what? me? it wasn't me
coach: oh yeah it was, you better knock it off
player: sorry coach, it wasn't me. they must have me confused with some other asian kid.

-----

*during a c-team game
coach(during a timeout): guys, we have to set better picks, we're not getting open.
player 1(to player 2): do you know what a pick is?
player 2: *blank stare*
coach: guys, we went over picks in practice
player2: *blank stare*

On the shortbus..

One of our players was so proud of his drawing on the shortbus today....here it is... God help us

shortbus..

player(to a player on the girls team): can i go to the movies with you?
girl: what? with me? are you serious?
player: yea, come on! i'll be quiet and everything, i promise!
girl: no way, not going to happen. ever..

---

*10 minutes after practice is over
coach: hey, where are your parents? it's 10 after.
player: i don't know, i'll call them
player(on the phone): where are you guys? huh? now? oh, ok..
*the parents were sitting in the car waiting for him to get in for 15 minutes, in plain view of us and the player....

---

*while checking out uniforms
coach(to player < 5ft., 85 lbs.): hey, you could just cut armholes in those shorts and tie them around your neck, then you wouldn't need a jersey
player: yea i know, in fact i can do that with all the shorts i own!

---

coach (after player made 4 shots in a row during scrimmage): man, you're on fire today.
player: man coach, i'm just getting lucky today!
coach: you know what, i'd rather have you lucky than good any day!

my view from blind

here's my view during my latest turkey hunt. i'm glad i saw him, cause i'm sure i won't during rifle season...

Game time!

more shortbus..

player (an 8th grader):  do we have to run if we miss free throws
coach:  yes, just like we always have.  didn't you play all last year?
player:  yea, i did, but that was back when i was stupid.
coach:  i see things have really changed


player 1:  what are we doing again?
coach:  come on man, what's wrong with you?  i've explained it several times already
player 2:  don't mind him coach, he's the guy who was convinced during football season that a circle has 2 sides.


coach:  so are you still allergic to everything?
player:  no, actually i think i've grown out of a few allergies.  they moved me from a 5 year allergy shot plan to only 4 years now.
coach:  good news, so what are you still allergic to.
player:  mainly my teachers
coach:  teachers?
player:  maybe it's not the teachers, i think i'm just allergic to "mean".


-note*:  i told you this was going to be a good year!

shortbus preview

the season is early, and we got a few shy ones so far, but here's a post to get started:  *as always, i couldn't make these up.

(coach demonstrating mikan drill)
player 1:  mikan, mike and ike, mmm, i like mike and ike's.  do you like mike and ike's?

player 2:  you're an idiot....


(speaking to player sitting on the floor on the baseline)
coach:  are you ok?
player:  yea..
coach:  what happened?
player:  i got hit in the eye with the ball..
coach:  it's tough to catch with your eye, try your hands next time